Time to kill time

Understanding time is absolutely fundamental to understanding what we are and how to bring about order in oneself and our lives.

Its important to understand what time actually is so that we can understand the mechanism of thought and memory. In the comprehension of what time actually is and not what we think it is, gives a human being the ability to step out of the stream of thought and see things from the present moment

Time is like a line and you are at point A and you are going to Point B in the future, so we wonder how much time it will take to get there. So we say it will take 12 days. We imagine what it will be like each step of the way, how we will arrive, how we will behave, who will be there and so forth, but we do all of that in the imagination. So this is psychological time, not chronological, soon you will see the difference.

So time is 12 days from now, but on each point of the journey on each step there is only the present step, time only comes into anything when I use my imagination, if I don’t use my imagination there is no psychological time.

In my imagination I can go backwards in time and review memories, or I can go forward in time and imagine various scenarios. Going backwards and forwards in time like this is a process of thought, memory and imagination.

Which brings me to something very important and that is what is thought, what is memory, what is knowledge, what is experience and what does this have to do with time.

Without this information, you cannot lay a foundation to understanding oneself and you have to understand yourself.

It is not me who came up with this information it’s been around for a long time, discover if its true for yourself. I believe it to be true because in applying the information and carefully looking at it, I have established a right foundation for understanding myself, what I am, thought and everything else.

It can be frightening looking at what we are, however it is essential to find out what you are not by what another thinks but finding out for yourself.

So knowledge and experience is stored in memory and memory reacts to challenges creating thought. Thought is an electrical movement between one memory cell and another.

Memory is the past, knowledge is the past, experience is the past and thought is the movement from one past memory to another. All of it is psychological time.

So we need time to arrange to meet somebody, the time of the watch, the seasons, the movement around the sun. That is chronological time and we have to have it to function in the world.

But is there a difference between chronological time, which is a practical necessity, and psychological time (i.e. using the imagination to move backwards and forwards in time).

I like to imagine myself in the future looking good having a good time, I like to look at the past in memory all the good times I had. Is there anything wrong in this? It makes me feel good…..

At some event in the past I have been frightened and there is a similar event coming up in the future, so I project from the past into the future the same thing happening again, and I am frightened, anxious, resisting in my mind, in my imagination this event in the future. The terror increases the closer I get to an event, which is all taking place in my mind.

So perhaps the question is not whether there is anything wrong in using the imagination to go backwards and forwards in time but whether it is beneficial.

Obviously chronological time, the calendar or watch is absolutely necessary for mankind to organize anything, however thought creates a new type of time by going backwards and forwards in imagination and perhaps we do this obsessively either to escape what is actually taking place, to try and project security or to give us endless pleasure, thinking over an event.

However the process is the same backwards and forwards in imagination.

We are just looking at the moment, looking at what the processes of the mind are in human beings. How we work. Not that it is wrong or right, but just looking.

Why do we do this? And what are the problems of doing such a thing; I mean everybody does it, no?

It’s a big problem to understand all this, because you are understanding the composition of “you”, how far will you go? Does it frighten you, looking into what you are? Are you afraid you may divide yourself, fragment yourself. There is no need, we are thought, so don’t divide yourself and say that you are something else. We are thought. Are you afraid that you are nothing? Don’t worry about this either as in understanding yourself you will discover that this fear is baseless. Thought has created an artificial division and the very understanding of oneself and the limitations of thought puts an end to this fear and thus the discovery of what meditation is.

To find out if there is something beyond thought, thought has to be in order. We have to be in order to discover that which is beyond time, beyond imagination. Which is the next step of mankind of human beings. It’s a big leap but we are going to do it together.

You are thought, you may say there is thought and there is me, there is no such distinction, you are thought, do not divide yourself.

By constantly going back in time in your imagination and remembering pleasurable experiences (which is a way of avoiding the present moment, avoiding what you actually are, your pains, sorrow etc.) you are also creating time in the future and the past, and this leads to fear, avoidance, anxiety, loneliness, isolation and suffering and the endless pursuit of pleasure to avoid pain.

How? Well we are happy to go back in time and constantly be remembering positive experiences but we are also going back in time and remembering negative experiences, pains and projecting them through the present moment into the future. This creates fear of a future event or situation, as we perceive the event getting closer we resist more and more and this resistance is fear, anxiety.

So going backwards and forwards in memory and imagination is creating time. There is no actual time accept this psychological time and we are bound by its activity. Great freedom is felt when we fully understand the mechanism of time and step out of it.

So fear is the projection of the past into the future.

So we can say that fear and the pursuit of pleasure are the misapplication of the imagination by creating psychological time.

At this point we have to ask what is pleasure? And perhaps also what is joy? Is joy, pleasure? Do you ever remember as a child seeing a big open space and just wanting to run? Do you remember ever waking up and it being really sunny and you just want to go outside and play. What about the first time you heard Beethoven or some music you loved or thoroughly enjoyed a good conversation.

Perhaps joy is experiencing something for the first time not experiencing something storing it in memory or a photograph and wanting it to be repeated. Because when you want to repeat something that gave great joy you are comparing the past memory to the present and trying to recreate. This we can call the pursuit of pleasure. (so again going back in memory, creating time)

Pleasure is chasing after something which you THINK (thought) will make you happy, something that will make you more, something that will be as great as it was before, the repetition of a past great memory.

Is the pursuit of pleasure born from memory from thought? Then what is joy? What does it mean to be really happy? Can we be self-conscious (be thinking about ourselves) and be happy?

Perhaps it is difficult to feel joy when we have so many problems, so many memories, so many hurts. Which we can recall at any moment relive them in our imagination. We would rather just live the pleasurable moments over and over again, but the painful memories keep coming back as well and projecting them into the future to try and make it secure like the past, creates fear and anxiety.

As long as you are going back and forwards in your mind reliving pleasurable experiences which is constantly creating psychological time through reviewing and re living pleasurable events stored in memory, then you will also be looking into the future and trying to make it secure. We do this by thinking about what will happen, it doesn’t matter how much we think about the future it cannot be secure, not like the past, so we project the past into the future trying to make it secure, the more we think about it the greater the problem becomes.

Thought “knows” the past and in knowledge it is secure, but it cannot “know” the future because the future is not known.  So we project the past into the future trying to make it safe (i.e. to know what happens) but we cannot know, thus creating uncertainty, and anxiety.

Where does this feeling of insecurity, uncertainty, and incompleteness come from? What’s causing it? Is thought causing it, thought being the response of memory to a challenge and memory containing knowledge and experience? You have to really think about this, because we are studying what we are, in discovering this you will discover what every human being on this planet is. This is difficult but absolutely necessary. You do not need a degree or some kind of special education or to be a special human, you just need to see the necessity of understanding what you are.

We are asking why we feel insecure, incomplete, why are we constantly going forward and back in time psychologically in our imagination, projecting the past into the future, in one sense it gives us pleasure to remember past events, however creating psychological time may also be making us want to make the future secure like our past is, so in the past we find security. So why are we seeking security all the time psychologically, obviously we need physical security, house, safe location, a little bit of money food and so on. But why are we seeking security constantly through our imagination, is it because we feel insecure, not complete?

Now why do we feel incomplete, insecure, and insufficient? Is that not why we are constantly creating psychological time? Because thought which is just knowledge the “known”, the past, is incomplete. You cannot have knowledge of the present nor the future, only the past is their knowledge. You cannot know what a tree is, you cannot know what a human is or a cloud or a bird. Know implies the known, known implies the past so knowledge is the past, is the accumulation of the past, stored in memory, projected through the imagination into the future.

See how difficult this is, and the more you “know” or the surer you are that you have the answers or your opinion is correct the more difficult this becomes. To investigate what you are, you cannot know the answer, which implies real humility; it implies a real wanting to understand a problem, really wanting to get to the bottom of what you are.

Why would we want to go so deep? Why understand all of this, why not just carry on? It depends how sensitive you are, not sensitive in the sense of being soft without internal strength and integrity, but your senses being awakened and your depth of compassion and feeling, this sense of not yielding and of wanting to be really happy and wanting for everyone else to share in this happiness. If you don’t feel like you need to look into this, perhaps you are not ready yet, perhaps you lack compassion, sensitivity, caring, perhaps you have not gathered enough experience as a human being, perhaps you do not know how to hold onto your experiences.

All of this can be sorted all can be healed all can be put in order. We only need to ask why do I lack these things? Find out, it’s really important, because the next question that we will have to ask and find out for ourselves is what is death and you cannot enquire into that unless you ask these questions first and lay the right foundation for being able to discover for yourself what life and death is.

Its really really important! We have to answer these questions ourselves not let anybody else tell you, whether they are correct or not makes no difference, what matters is what you are, the quality of your consciousness, the gathering of experience, this immense feeling of integrity, of not yielding to evil, this all comes with experience. We have to discover all of this while we are alive.

Everytime we discover something real for ourselves we transform not only ourselves but also our environment. Everything of power, every area of authority is against this inner transformation taking place in human beings. The monkeys will do anything to distract you from discovering what you are and what you are not. They will happily tell you what you are, what God or the Creator is, what to do, how to get there, but they will never be able to tell you how your own mind works and what lies beyond thought, beyond knowledge, into the infinite, the un-manifest. Only you can make that journey to grow into the light and we all must make that journey, there is no choice.

Lets look at the word “authority”. It implies the “author”. Author implies the originator, originator implies something original. Now what is original about repeating endlessly that which has been given to them by authority. They are just repeating from memory from knowledge, from a book. What is original? What gives them authority? Authority meaning the originator, what’s original its just repetition from books or some kind of ritual.

What is knowledge? What is the known? It is the past, stored in memory and repeated like a computer. Obviously its necessary to have knowledge on technical things and to speak, the word comes from memory. But we are discussing what we are, in doing this and learning for ourselves we are establishing a right foundation. Without this we cannot understand our life and the suffering and misery and horrors of this world will continue on and on, the past repeating and repeating endlessly, the abuse past on from one generation to the next.

How to break this endless chain of cause and effect and become really fantastic original human beings, creative, compassionate, integral, order of the highest kind, not class order, or some other stupid imposed order, but absolute inward Order!

When we put ourselves in order we will really help this world, we will be beyond the trivialities of the accepted order of society, we will be order! Not of another or some silly system or class but order per se. That is integrity, that is honour, that is honesty, to rise above what all others think of you, to deny that thought in the pursuit of absolute order and happiness, joy, not silly hollow pleasures. Then we can ask what is God, the Creator, the Infinite, the Unknowable a mind that is in order may have the ability to go into that which cannot be contained by knowledge, cannot be touched or stored away in memory. That is your adventure, that is your pursuit, your life.

So coming back to psychological time and moving backwards and forwards in your imagination. In one sense it gives pleasure to remember the past, gives one a sense of being this person, these memories these pictures from the past, I am this, and that gives a sense of belonging of security a feeling of safety especially when we do not know what we are.

Its always important to remember that you are thought, not that there is thought and you are something else. You are thought, do not divide yourself, you are all of it, the content of your consciousness.

So what I suggest and you have to look at this yourself, but perhaps thought being incomplete because it is the result of the past is trying to project itself into the future to make it secure. In doing so it creates fear and anxiety because it cannot make the future secure like the past even though we try. It just keeps on thinking and this creates more problems.

I will propose something, is compulsive thinking the result of unresolved memories. By unresolved I mean they have left an emotional residue, which you have not understood how to solve at the very moment the experience took place.

So is time the result of our insecurity, our feeling of incompleteness and this movement forwards and backwards in imagination to try and find security.

So this leads to the question, why do we feel insecure, incomplete or insufficient? To answer this you have to look at awareness, listening and observing which is meditation. Because we also have to ask the question are we just thought which is the response of memory? Or is there a direct observation without thought, memory. Can anybody answer that question on your behalf?

If you work on this diligently all the pieces will come together in a unitary process, but you cannot understand what you actually are unless you have learnt how to observe and listen without resistance, without thought interrupting.

Remember you are fighting to be free, you are fighting yourself.

Tomorrow I would like to talk about being sensitive, the awakening of the senses 😉


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